And don't you come back no more

[A Girl like you - Edwyn Collins]

I just watched Garden State, and it was amazing and beautiful and now belongs to the category of favourite romance movies - right next to The Notebook and Moulin Rouge.

I don't like romantic movies just because the kissing looks good, or because they make me cry, or because they have good looking actors/actresses (or whatever other dumb reasons ppl like romantic movies for).

The only reason I really like these movies is that they remind me of what it's like to be in love. To feel safe, like that moment in Garden state when Natalie Portman asked Zach How he was feeling and he replied Safe. I burst into tears at that exact moment because it was so fucking familiar.

Or to feel like nothing else in the world matters but being with that other person. Its rare that these feelings actually come by and when I think about it now, it was rare even in our long long relationship that I felt that way. People are always too caught up in with being busy, we're always running somewhere, not allowing ourselves to linger and feel in love.

Perhaps that's the one thing I wish we had done more, felt in love.

But I think I've recovered really well. I thought the day would never come, when I could look at our pictures/ listen to Snow Patrol and Graham Coxon's "See a better day" / walk past the park / many many other things, without bursting into tears.

I can cope with the very occasional outburst because of moments in movies like Garden State that bring back a wave of nostalgia, but other then that I'm good. I'm great actually, I'm beginning to wake up happy and content again. I don't know what day exactly this happened, but I just realised it a few days ago - I'm actually totally and completely over you. (:

It helps me see a better day
A voice inside is telling me to stay
I'm falling deeper everyday
I'm falling deeper everyday - Graham Coxon's "See a better day"